Guess what people! It’s nearly Christmas! We know you’re excited.
You have that turkey to look forward to, a break from school, maybe
some sledding or perhaps a nice game of scrabble in your future.
However, before you get to all that, why don’t you take a little break
from all your Christmas baking, grab a cookie, and settle down with
our newsletter. Trust us, you won’t be disappointed!
We have some fabulous things for you inside this cover. Nico tells us
all about what Christmas means to him, Allan Buckingham tells us all
about his trip to the holy land, and Jeff Poynter tell us about his trip to
Nicaragua (We are full of travel this issue). As well, we have fabulous
photos from all sorts of people– no Google searching for us this issue!
In fact, we had so many things that we wanted to put into this issue,
that we had to make two issues!! So after your done reading this one,
be sure to take a look at our special “Things to Check Out” issue as
well! We’ve got some interesting information about things happening
within the United Church in the coming year!
Anyways, we hope you all have a magical Christmas, and a fantastic
New Year. We plan too. Watch out for issue number 11 in Spring
2009! Merry Christmas!
-Charley and Kathleen
Monday, December 22, 2008
Christmas Spirit
When I think of Christmas, the first thought that
pops into my mind is of a snow-filled street. Snow is
lightly falling , and the glitter of colourful Christmas
lights is bouncing gleefully off of the snow, as if they
aren’t plugged into electricity at all, but rather some-
thing else—something magical, something not quite of
this world, but still somehow a mystical part.
Ace Collins once wrote, “The "First Christmas" was a
simple time of beauty and wonder. The birth of Christ
was less about celebration than it was about family.
Though many today may grow tired of the commerciali-
zation of Christmas, in reality it has opened the door for
Christ to once again become the focal point of the season,
and for family, especially children, to be at the heart of
the celebration.” This might be true, at least in part. I
mean…I hadn’t thought of it like this before. I had been
one of the ones who had been growing ‘tired of the
commercialization of Christmas’. When I think of it this
way, though, it makes sense to me. Sure, we buy a
bunch of presents, some of which will most likely be
thrown in the farthest corner of our closets. But who
cares? Whether the presents are used or not isn’t what
is important. The importance is what the presents do:
they bring our families together.
When Jesus was born, he had only his mother Mary,
his mother’s husband Joseph, whom he would grow to
know as his earthly father and mother. There were
bunch of farm animals too, including my favorite, the
cow. They were there as a family, to celebrate life to-
gether. Now, maybe you don’t think we should buy pre-
sents for Christmas, but for some people, it’s their only
excuse to see their family. I know I don’t see my
brother and sister-in-law and their children nearly as
much as I like. In fact, I don’t really see them much at
all any more. But Christmas and the presents we have
exchanged have always been a reason for us to get to-
gether and spend time together. Regardless, didn’t Je-
sus get presents for his birth? The Three Wise Men ar-
rived some two years after with gifts of frankincense,
myrrh, and gold.
There is also another side of Christmas: the side of
Christmas that a lot of people prefer to focus on these
days. “Christmas, my child, is love in action. Every time
we love, every time we give, it's Christmas”, said Dale
Evans. What I believe he is speaking of is not always
giving of physical things, commercial items, but giving
of yourself. Showing someone that you love and care
about them is a gift no words can describe— a true
Christmas present.
We tend to limit Christmas to one time a year. No,
Christmas extends beyond Demember. Christmas is
every minute of every hour of everyday. Christmas is
kindness in action, love in community and the spirit of
giving. Christmas is in the beauty of the spirit drawn to
another in harmony when there seems to be nothing
but strife. “Christmas is love in action,” Dale Evans
says. Love in action! It isn’t just saying to someone, “Oh
yeah, I love you. Where’s the turkey? Where are my
presents?” It’s so much more. It’s a feeling, an emotion,
not quite tangible, but ever present.
Christmas brings people together in a spirit of
love. When you sit down to whatever food you typically
dine on at Christmas with family or friends sitting
across from you, when you’ve made the conscious ef-
fort to be with people you care about and love, that is
the love of Christmas in action. That is what the birth of
Christ is all about.
The spirit of Christmas is not all about the presents,
and it’s not about the food— these are just catalysts
that help bring together. This is what the truest spirit
of Christmas, what that very first Christmas was all
about—being together with those who matter most to
you.To me, I would say that the ones who matter most
to me are my mother, brother, sister-in-law, nephew
and niece. But are they the only ones meaningful to
me? They do mean the world to me, of course. But
there are friends out there that mean the world to me
as well. And I’d love to be with them all the time too.
Including Christmas.
There are times when I long to be with those that I
care about. I just wish that those times of gathering like
Christmas and Easter and other such holidays weren’t
the only times that I got to see them. I always find it to
be a gift just to be able to see them. I love to see them.
But maybe that’s why Dale Evans said that Christmas
was love in action. The truest form of Christmas doesn’t
happen on December 25th but whenever we are with
those we love and care for. Whenever I am with a
friend that I love that I haven’t seen in a long time, that
is a gift, the Christmas spirit in it’s truest form. A hug
from a nephew, such a sweet little gift, is the spirit of
Christmas. And it could happen in the middle of sum-
mer, on the hottest day of the year.
“Remember,” Cindy Lew-Hoo says, “the greatest gift
is not found in a store nor under a tree, but in the
hearts of true friends.” So, the next time you worry
about which present you’re going to get for your birth-
day or under the tree at Christmas, remember those
presents don’t matter. Money and presents can bring
you together with those that you care about, but most
important is that you are with someone you deeply
care about. This Christmas season, I ask you to look for
a family member, look for a friend. Find someone you
can connect to. That is the greatest gift of all. That is
where you will find the spirit of Christmas. And do
yourself a favour, don’t just look for them at Christmas.
There is an acapella music group from British Columbia
who sing a song, “Tell Them Before It’s too Late”. Heed
to these words. If there is someone you love and care
about, tell them.
The Hutterites have a saying, “Live as if you’ll live
forever, but live today as if it is your last.” The spirit of
Christmas has given us a gift. Use it wisely. In those
gifted moments with those you care for, spend them as
if they’ll last forever. Live as though they won’t be there
forever, treasure them, and tell them how much they
mean to you.
With that I leave you these words by Leo Buscaglia:
“A single rose can be my garden... a single friend, my
world.” May your world be one long Christmas and may
love sprinkle down like snow upon it every single day.
-Nico Anderson
pops into my mind is of a snow-filled street. Snow is
lightly falling , and the glitter of colourful Christmas
lights is bouncing gleefully off of the snow, as if they
aren’t plugged into electricity at all, but rather some-
thing else—something magical, something not quite of
this world, but still somehow a mystical part.
Ace Collins once wrote, “The "First Christmas" was a
simple time of beauty and wonder. The birth of Christ
was less about celebration than it was about family.
Though many today may grow tired of the commerciali-
zation of Christmas, in reality it has opened the door for
Christ to once again become the focal point of the season,
and for family, especially children, to be at the heart of
the celebration.” This might be true, at least in part. I
mean…I hadn’t thought of it like this before. I had been
one of the ones who had been growing ‘tired of the
commercialization of Christmas’. When I think of it this
way, though, it makes sense to me. Sure, we buy a
bunch of presents, some of which will most likely be
thrown in the farthest corner of our closets. But who
cares? Whether the presents are used or not isn’t what
is important. The importance is what the presents do:
they bring our families together.
When Jesus was born, he had only his mother Mary,
his mother’s husband Joseph, whom he would grow to
know as his earthly father and mother. There were
bunch of farm animals too, including my favorite, the
cow. They were there as a family, to celebrate life to-
gether. Now, maybe you don’t think we should buy pre-
sents for Christmas, but for some people, it’s their only
excuse to see their family. I know I don’t see my
brother and sister-in-law and their children nearly as
much as I like. In fact, I don’t really see them much at
all any more. But Christmas and the presents we have
exchanged have always been a reason for us to get to-
gether and spend time together. Regardless, didn’t Je-
sus get presents for his birth? The Three Wise Men ar-
rived some two years after with gifts of frankincense,
myrrh, and gold.
There is also another side of Christmas: the side of
Christmas that a lot of people prefer to focus on these
days. “Christmas, my child, is love in action. Every time
we love, every time we give, it's Christmas”, said Dale
Evans. What I believe he is speaking of is not always
giving of physical things, commercial items, but giving
of yourself. Showing someone that you love and care
about them is a gift no words can describe— a true
Christmas present.
We tend to limit Christmas to one time a year. No,
Christmas extends beyond Demember. Christmas is
every minute of every hour of everyday. Christmas is
kindness in action, love in community and the spirit of
giving. Christmas is in the beauty of the spirit drawn to
another in harmony when there seems to be nothing
but strife. “Christmas is love in action,” Dale Evans
says. Love in action! It isn’t just saying to someone, “Oh
yeah, I love you. Where’s the turkey? Where are my
presents?” It’s so much more. It’s a feeling, an emotion,
not quite tangible, but ever present.
Christmas brings people together in a spirit of
love. When you sit down to whatever food you typically
dine on at Christmas with family or friends sitting
across from you, when you’ve made the conscious ef-
fort to be with people you care about and love, that is
the love of Christmas in action. That is what the birth of
Christ is all about.
The spirit of Christmas is not all about the presents,
and it’s not about the food— these are just catalysts
that help bring together. This is what the truest spirit
of Christmas, what that very first Christmas was all
about—being together with those who matter most to
you.To me, I would say that the ones who matter most
to me are my mother, brother, sister-in-law, nephew
and niece. But are they the only ones meaningful to
me? They do mean the world to me, of course. But
there are friends out there that mean the world to me
as well. And I’d love to be with them all the time too.
Including Christmas.
There are times when I long to be with those that I
care about. I just wish that those times of gathering like
Christmas and Easter and other such holidays weren’t
the only times that I got to see them. I always find it to
be a gift just to be able to see them. I love to see them.
But maybe that’s why Dale Evans said that Christmas
was love in action. The truest form of Christmas doesn’t
happen on December 25th but whenever we are with
those we love and care for. Whenever I am with a
friend that I love that I haven’t seen in a long time, that
is a gift, the Christmas spirit in it’s truest form. A hug
from a nephew, such a sweet little gift, is the spirit of
Christmas. And it could happen in the middle of sum-
mer, on the hottest day of the year.
“Remember,” Cindy Lew-Hoo says, “the greatest gift
is not found in a store nor under a tree, but in the
hearts of true friends.” So, the next time you worry
about which present you’re going to get for your birth-
day or under the tree at Christmas, remember those
presents don’t matter. Money and presents can bring
you together with those that you care about, but most
important is that you are with someone you deeply
care about. This Christmas season, I ask you to look for
a family member, look for a friend. Find someone you
can connect to. That is the greatest gift of all. That is
where you will find the spirit of Christmas. And do
yourself a favour, don’t just look for them at Christmas.
There is an acapella music group from British Columbia
who sing a song, “Tell Them Before It’s too Late”. Heed
to these words. If there is someone you love and care
about, tell them.
The Hutterites have a saying, “Live as if you’ll live
forever, but live today as if it is your last.” The spirit of
Christmas has given us a gift. Use it wisely. In those
gifted moments with those you care for, spend them as
if they’ll last forever. Live as though they won’t be there
forever, treasure them, and tell them how much they
mean to you.
With that I leave you these words by Leo Buscaglia:
“A single rose can be my garden... a single friend, my
world.” May your world be one long Christmas and may
love sprinkle down like snow upon it every single day.
-Nico Anderson
Sharing the Improbable
The following is a blog post written this summer
during a Liberation Theology conference in the Holy
Land put on by Sabeel, a Palestinian Liberation Theology
organization based in Jerusalem. Allan is a United
Church member living in Banff and also a member of the
General Council Executive.
How do you share the improbable (I’d say im-
possible, but I’ve seen it, so it’s real)? So much of the
world I’ve been exposed to is completely foreign to my
reality that I’m not sure I can even comprehend it,
never mind share it. But, I’ll try.
The Holy Land is an incredibly beautiful place.
The landscape around Jerusalem is a testament to
God’s creative magic. More than that, there is some-
thing special about this place that defies my under-
standing. I don’t know that I can describe it in words,
but there is a feeling deep inside me, one that I get in
Jerusalem, one that I get few other places. I share this
because it is the backdrop where the stories of the Holy
Land take place, both those of the past and those of the
future.
While the backdrop is unbelievably beautiful,
the stories themselves are plainly unbelievable. I could
share stories of things I’ve heard, and things I have
seen, that even I have trouble believing myself. But,
seeing as I’m not sure I believe them, I will keep them
to myself for now.
What I can share, because I can’t deny its real-
ity, no matter how much I may want to, is the extreme
prejudice that is blatantly obvious everywhere we go.
This morning, on our way out of Bethlehem, we saw the
piles of taxies on each side of the checkpoint waiting to
take people to their destinations; not because the peo-
ple here are incapable of driving themselves, but be-
cause Palestinians in Bethlehem are not allowed to
drive to Jerusalem. Instead, they have to walk through
a Giant Checkpoint. We were told that people start lin-
ing up at 3:30 in the morning in order to get to work on
time even though the checkpoint doesn’t open until 6
am.
For me as middle class Canadian, it is so incredi-
bly foreign that because of completely uncontrollable
circumstances (ethnic origin) a single person, never
mind thousands of people, would not be allowed to
drive themselves 10 minutes to work. It is completely
ridiculous. I can think of no other words to describe it.
And this from a country that claims to be a part of the
‘western world’ and shares ‘western’ values!
Being in the land where Christ was made
known, I can’t help but wonder how his message has
been so tragically lost. It’s not as if the stories aren’t
remembered. Millions of people visit the Holy Land
each year to see where Christ walked, to listen to the
story of his life. But I wonder if they are perhaps listen-
ing to the words without hearing the story.
-Allan Buckingham
during a Liberation Theology conference in the Holy
Land put on by Sabeel, a Palestinian Liberation Theology
organization based in Jerusalem. Allan is a United
Church member living in Banff and also a member of the
General Council Executive.
How do you share the improbable (I’d say im-
possible, but I’ve seen it, so it’s real)? So much of the
world I’ve been exposed to is completely foreign to my
reality that I’m not sure I can even comprehend it,
never mind share it. But, I’ll try.
The Holy Land is an incredibly beautiful place.
The landscape around Jerusalem is a testament to
God’s creative magic. More than that, there is some-
thing special about this place that defies my under-
standing. I don’t know that I can describe it in words,
but there is a feeling deep inside me, one that I get in
Jerusalem, one that I get few other places. I share this
because it is the backdrop where the stories of the Holy
Land take place, both those of the past and those of the
future.
While the backdrop is unbelievably beautiful,
the stories themselves are plainly unbelievable. I could
share stories of things I’ve heard, and things I have
seen, that even I have trouble believing myself. But,
seeing as I’m not sure I believe them, I will keep them
to myself for now.
What I can share, because I can’t deny its real-
ity, no matter how much I may want to, is the extreme
prejudice that is blatantly obvious everywhere we go.
This morning, on our way out of Bethlehem, we saw the
piles of taxies on each side of the checkpoint waiting to
take people to their destinations; not because the peo-
ple here are incapable of driving themselves, but be-
cause Palestinians in Bethlehem are not allowed to
drive to Jerusalem. Instead, they have to walk through
a Giant Checkpoint. We were told that people start lin-
ing up at 3:30 in the morning in order to get to work on
time even though the checkpoint doesn’t open until 6
am.
For me as middle class Canadian, it is so incredi-
bly foreign that because of completely uncontrollable
circumstances (ethnic origin) a single person, never
mind thousands of people, would not be allowed to
drive themselves 10 minutes to work. It is completely
ridiculous. I can think of no other words to describe it.
And this from a country that claims to be a part of the
‘western world’ and shares ‘western’ values!
Being in the land where Christ was made
known, I can’t help but wonder how his message has
been so tragically lost. It’s not as if the stories aren’t
remembered. Millions of people visit the Holy Land
each year to see where Christ walked, to listen to the
story of his life. But I wonder if they are perhaps listen-
ing to the words without hearing the story.
-Allan Buckingham
Who am I?
It seems like an easy question. I'm so and so, I
like to do this and that, and I don't like such and forth.
But before you get to locked into this answer,
really really look at it. Is this who you are, or is this
what you are? It's what you are isn't it?
So now ask yourself again. WHO are you?
I'm taking some weird classes this semester.
Classes such as “Interpersonal Communication” and
“Leadership/Self-Awareness” and so I am supposed to
be learning all sorts of things about myself. Picture a
United Church event (maybe youth rally, youth forum,
or Kairos) only you get graded on it. So if you learn
nothing about yourself you fail the class. So if you don't
learn what the teacher wants you to learn about your-
self, you fail the class. And you’re not looking at your-
self through a spiritual perspective. I'm used to doing
these types of things which where God fits in, with
where Church fits in. But there is no God in these
classes. It’s all very weird. But I digress.
So in my leadership class I was told I had to
learn who I was by the end of the semester, or I would
never be a good leader, and I would not do well in the
class. It came at a weird time, because I had just de-
cided (at a United Church event the week before) that I
was going to stop searching for who I was, that I was
just going to be me. Well, so much for that plan. So now
I am once again on yet another journey to discover my-
self.
So who am I? I'm Kathleen. That's as far as I
manage to get. Maybe being “Kathleen” is what I am but
not who I am, but I have identified myself with that im-
age for so long I am somewhat unable to not be Kath-
leen. And so I am not Kathleen in a “Kathleen is a name”
but I am what being Kathleen embodies for me, Kath-
leen IS who I am. I am what you think of when you
think of me. When someone says “Hey, do you know
Kathleen” or “Hey, have you heard what Kathleen's
been up too?” its all the images that you get in your
head. This is who I am. I am Kathleen.
So then, this probably isn't going to help me
pass my class. So who is Kathleen?
We've established that who am is not an ex-
farm kid, or a dancer, or that girl who does WHY or a
student or any of the other easy labels I like to put on
myself. So instead maybe I am what I believe in. Maybe
who I am is a person who believes in doubt, in life, in
God, in fluke, in miracles, in myself.
But, as it turns out, I am not supposed to associ-
ate myself with my beliefs. It creates close-mindedness.
Questioning our beliefs is so hard because we associate
ourselves with our beliefs, because questioning our
beliefs becomes questioning who we are as a person. If
we refuse too connect our identity with our beliefs,
then we become more “intellectually courageous” and
more open minded.
So I have learned what I am not, and what I
should not be. I am not what I am. I am not what I be-
lieve in. What I have not learned is who I actually am.
Or how to discover who I am. And so I shall continue on
this journey. I will continue to learn who I am not. And
maybe under all the am nots I will find the am.
Because what I think is that I will never know
who I am. What I think is that no one will ever know
exactly who they are. I think this inability to now who
we are makes us better people as it allows us to grow
and change, and not become stuck with who we are. It
allows us to become someone new. So while I will con-
tinue to search for who I am, with some protest I might
add, I will also hope that in finding it (if I find it) that I
won't get stuck in it. I hope that I always have the abil-
ity to change.
And so I will end with a favourite quote of mine.
Don't let getting older make you stupider.
-Kathleen Kerr
like to do this and that, and I don't like such and forth.
But before you get to locked into this answer,
really really look at it. Is this who you are, or is this
what you are? It's what you are isn't it?
So now ask yourself again. WHO are you?
I'm taking some weird classes this semester.
Classes such as “Interpersonal Communication” and
“Leadership/Self-Awareness” and so I am supposed to
be learning all sorts of things about myself. Picture a
United Church event (maybe youth rally, youth forum,
or Kairos) only you get graded on it. So if you learn
nothing about yourself you fail the class. So if you don't
learn what the teacher wants you to learn about your-
self, you fail the class. And you’re not looking at your-
self through a spiritual perspective. I'm used to doing
these types of things which where God fits in, with
where Church fits in. But there is no God in these
classes. It’s all very weird. But I digress.
So in my leadership class I was told I had to
learn who I was by the end of the semester, or I would
never be a good leader, and I would not do well in the
class. It came at a weird time, because I had just de-
cided (at a United Church event the week before) that I
was going to stop searching for who I was, that I was
just going to be me. Well, so much for that plan. So now
I am once again on yet another journey to discover my-
self.
So who am I? I'm Kathleen. That's as far as I
manage to get. Maybe being “Kathleen” is what I am but
not who I am, but I have identified myself with that im-
age for so long I am somewhat unable to not be Kath-
leen. And so I am not Kathleen in a “Kathleen is a name”
but I am what being Kathleen embodies for me, Kath-
leen IS who I am. I am what you think of when you
think of me. When someone says “Hey, do you know
Kathleen” or “Hey, have you heard what Kathleen's
been up too?” its all the images that you get in your
head. This is who I am. I am Kathleen.
So then, this probably isn't going to help me
pass my class. So who is Kathleen?
We've established that who am is not an ex-
farm kid, or a dancer, or that girl who does WHY or a
student or any of the other easy labels I like to put on
myself. So instead maybe I am what I believe in. Maybe
who I am is a person who believes in doubt, in life, in
God, in fluke, in miracles, in myself.
But, as it turns out, I am not supposed to associ-
ate myself with my beliefs. It creates close-mindedness.
Questioning our beliefs is so hard because we associate
ourselves with our beliefs, because questioning our
beliefs becomes questioning who we are as a person. If
we refuse too connect our identity with our beliefs,
then we become more “intellectually courageous” and
more open minded.
So I have learned what I am not, and what I
should not be. I am not what I am. I am not what I be-
lieve in. What I have not learned is who I actually am.
Or how to discover who I am. And so I shall continue on
this journey. I will continue to learn who I am not. And
maybe under all the am nots I will find the am.
Because what I think is that I will never know
who I am. What I think is that no one will ever know
exactly who they are. I think this inability to now who
we are makes us better people as it allows us to grow
and change, and not become stuck with who we are. It
allows us to become someone new. So while I will con-
tinue to search for who I am, with some protest I might
add, I will also hope that in finding it (if I find it) that I
won't get stuck in it. I hope that I always have the abil-
ity to change.
And so I will end with a favourite quote of mine.
Don't let getting older make you stupider.
-Kathleen Kerr
What I did with my Summer Vacation
Rejoice with those who rejoice, weep with
those who weep. Live in harmony with one another;
live peaceably with all. (Romans 12:15-16)
My best friend Amy Collins and I spent two
months volunteering in Nicaragua this summer - it was
a trip primarily focused on service and learning. We
volunteered every day during the week and attended
Spanish school, and on the weekends we would take a
break and go on excursions around the country. We
had plans for three volunteer placements; however, we
soon learned that in Latin America, it can be very diffi-
cult to make plans months in advance and then see
them realized. Due to civil strife and natural disasters,
all these plans were cancelled once we were in the
country, and we ended up working with other (though
no less valid) organizations.
In the first city where we stayed (Managua), we
taught music to children who couldn’t afford music les-
sons (at “Musica en los Barrios”). We also volunteered
at a community centre called Generando Vida
(“Generating Life”), which is located in a poor area of
the city and has a few classrooms, feeding programs,
and microcredit for women of the community. Here, we
again learned the value of flexibility, as we never knew
quite what we would be doing, if we would even make
it there on a given day because of the nation-wide pub-
lic transit strike, and because of our lack of Spanish
skills. After three weeks in Managua, we travelled to
Estelí, a city in the northern mountains of the country.
The first place we worked was Proyecto Padre Fab-
retto, an after-school program for children who were
struggling with their studies. We worked as teachers'
assistants, helping the children with their English, arts,
and music. After a week at this school, we spent two
weeks at the Escuela Especial – a school for children
with disabilities. We did the same kind of work here,
helping the teachers and helping the students.
It was here in Estelí that we learned one of our
valuable lessons about volunteering in Central Amer-
ica. Living in Nicaragua is simpler, slower, and friend-
lier, and this came across in work and work ethic as
well. We came from a North American mentality that
dictates the essentiality of efficiency and productivity.
However, Nicaragua does not seem to share this view.
Amy and I often became frustrated because we felt we
weren’t being productive or helpful, but when we fi-
nally realized that we needed to be slower and more
relaxed, everything seemed to shift into focus and we
felt much more useful. We often dealt with indifference
from others and a lack of “productivity”, but once we
learned to just accept whatever happened as long as we
were trying hard, everything went more smoothly.
After three weeks in Estelí, we went back to Managua
to reconnect with Gonzalo Duarte, the organizer of our
trip and three other Canadians. With this expanded
group, we worked for a week at Pajarito Azul, an or-
phanage for children with disabilities. I helped in a
room of people with cerebral palsy, which was an eye-
opening experience. Because of their disability, they
were unable to perform even the basic necessities – we
needed to spoon-feed them, take them outside for fresh
air, and just provide the simple companionship that
they usually lacked. It was difficult to see people living
in this situation, and I tried my best to empathize and
do the best I could to help.
We had many other crazy and amazing adven-
tures as well, from climbing a 1,700 meter high active
volcano (on an island in a lake with the only freshwater
sharks in the world) that took 11 hours in 40-degree
weather with a guide who could speak 12 languages
and was able to smell when there was a boa constrictor
nearby, to surfing in the Pacific, to meeting some of the
most amazing people in the world, to camping over-
night on top of another active volcano and climbing up
at night to peer into the crater and watch the lava, to
frustrations with ourselves and each other, to heart-
wrenching views of poverty (Nicaragua is the poorest
country in the Western Hemisphere), to a massive
political rally calling for the downfall of the cor-
rupt government, to sitting at the foot of a cross all
morning on top of the highest mountain in a misty
coffee-growing town… the stories go on and on.
Despite repeated changes of plans and fre-
quent failures of preconceived notions, the trip
was a definite success. It is something that I will
remember for the rest of my life, and something
that will also forever affect me. I’m still figuring
out how to incorporate this incredible life experi-
ence into my everyday life – into my faith, my mu-
sic, my perspectives, my choices, my opinions… I
can only pray that my God will guide me in these
ways.
-Jeff Poynter
those who weep. Live in harmony with one another;
live peaceably with all. (Romans 12:15-16)
My best friend Amy Collins and I spent two
months volunteering in Nicaragua this summer - it was
a trip primarily focused on service and learning. We
volunteered every day during the week and attended
Spanish school, and on the weekends we would take a
break and go on excursions around the country. We
had plans for three volunteer placements; however, we
soon learned that in Latin America, it can be very diffi-
cult to make plans months in advance and then see
them realized. Due to civil strife and natural disasters,
all these plans were cancelled once we were in the
country, and we ended up working with other (though
no less valid) organizations.
In the first city where we stayed (Managua), we
taught music to children who couldn’t afford music les-
sons (at “Musica en los Barrios”). We also volunteered
at a community centre called Generando Vida
(“Generating Life”), which is located in a poor area of
the city and has a few classrooms, feeding programs,
and microcredit for women of the community. Here, we
again learned the value of flexibility, as we never knew
quite what we would be doing, if we would even make
it there on a given day because of the nation-wide pub-
lic transit strike, and because of our lack of Spanish
skills. After three weeks in Managua, we travelled to
Estelí, a city in the northern mountains of the country.
The first place we worked was Proyecto Padre Fab-
retto, an after-school program for children who were
struggling with their studies. We worked as teachers'
assistants, helping the children with their English, arts,
and music. After a week at this school, we spent two
weeks at the Escuela Especial – a school for children
with disabilities. We did the same kind of work here,
helping the teachers and helping the students.
It was here in Estelí that we learned one of our
valuable lessons about volunteering in Central Amer-
ica. Living in Nicaragua is simpler, slower, and friend-
lier, and this came across in work and work ethic as
well. We came from a North American mentality that
dictates the essentiality of efficiency and productivity.
However, Nicaragua does not seem to share this view.
Amy and I often became frustrated because we felt we
weren’t being productive or helpful, but when we fi-
nally realized that we needed to be slower and more
relaxed, everything seemed to shift into focus and we
felt much more useful. We often dealt with indifference
from others and a lack of “productivity”, but once we
learned to just accept whatever happened as long as we
were trying hard, everything went more smoothly.
After three weeks in Estelí, we went back to Managua
to reconnect with Gonzalo Duarte, the organizer of our
trip and three other Canadians. With this expanded
group, we worked for a week at Pajarito Azul, an or-
phanage for children with disabilities. I helped in a
room of people with cerebral palsy, which was an eye-
opening experience. Because of their disability, they
were unable to perform even the basic necessities – we
needed to spoon-feed them, take them outside for fresh
air, and just provide the simple companionship that
they usually lacked. It was difficult to see people living
in this situation, and I tried my best to empathize and
do the best I could to help.
We had many other crazy and amazing adven-
tures as well, from climbing a 1,700 meter high active
volcano (on an island in a lake with the only freshwater
sharks in the world) that took 11 hours in 40-degree
weather with a guide who could speak 12 languages
and was able to smell when there was a boa constrictor
nearby, to surfing in the Pacific, to meeting some of the
most amazing people in the world, to camping over-
night on top of another active volcano and climbing up
at night to peer into the crater and watch the lava, to
frustrations with ourselves and each other, to heart-
wrenching views of poverty (Nicaragua is the poorest
country in the Western Hemisphere), to a massive
political rally calling for the downfall of the cor-
rupt government, to sitting at the foot of a cross all
morning on top of the highest mountain in a misty
coffee-growing town… the stories go on and on.
Despite repeated changes of plans and fre-
quent failures of preconceived notions, the trip
was a definite success. It is something that I will
remember for the rest of my life, and something
that will also forever affect me. I’m still figuring
out how to incorporate this incredible life experi-
ence into my everyday life – into my faith, my mu-
sic, my perspectives, my choices, my opinions… I
can only pray that my God will guide me in these
ways.
-Jeff Poynter
End Notes
EMAILS THAT MADE OUR DAY:
I wanted to offer my congratulations on the Observer Article. Very well deserved. I think the church needs to hear about all
you've done with WHY, and what it means to those of us who read it. Thank you, both of you, for all you do. - Charlie Peters
Great job, WHY team! It was great to see you featured on the front page of the Observer, too. I really enjoyed Cory Bentley’s
article (but I’m a bit biased… I’m his aunt). :) -Jen
Just read your WHY newsletter for the first time. Some excellent stuff there. I will continue reading, hoping for ideas we can
use here in Northern Ontario. Keep up the good work, and all the best in your studies. -Bob Weight
Kathleen and Charley, you both are wonderful and lovely, and I wish I could give you both giant hugs. The W.H.Y in my inbox
every season is one of the only reasons I check it. I will definitely submit something sometime soon. -Emma Prestwich
Congratulations on your second anniversary!!! I am particularly grateful for this issue for its breadth and depth: the articles
are deeply personal, inspiringly honest, and incredibly humorous. I enjoyed it immensely! Thank you for providing this
wonderful forum for youth and young adults in our church to connect and reflect with one another: YOU ROCK!!!! -Shawna
Gibbons
PARTING WORDS:
Well, that’s all folks. You have reached the end. Or, soon will. If this paragraph would just end…
but it doesn’t. We’d like to send out a great big thank-you-amungo to our guest writers– Nico
Anderson, Allan Buckingham, and Jeff Poynter, as well as to our fabulous photographers, Carmen
Lansdowne, Bruce Edwards and Gord Spence (http://www.flickr.com/photos/rev_aviator/). We
couldn’t do this without you guys.
As for everyone else, now that school is done, and you have finished reading this fabulous news-
letter, perhaps you might have some time to write an article for our next issue? We would defi-
nitely recommend it. Also, maybe you get a new camera for Christmas, and have taken some
wonderful photographs— why not take a few extra seconds to send them to us, or even a link to
you Facebook (where we know you’re probably already putting your photo’s) and let us steal
them off of there! Once you’re done, send them to us at wonderingholyyouth@gmail.com
Well, that’s all folks. For real this time! Have a merry merry Christmas!!!
I wanted to offer my congratulations on the Observer Article. Very well deserved. I think the church needs to hear about all
you've done with WHY, and what it means to those of us who read it. Thank you, both of you, for all you do. - Charlie Peters
Great job, WHY team! It was great to see you featured on the front page of the Observer, too. I really enjoyed Cory Bentley’s
article (but I’m a bit biased… I’m his aunt). :) -Jen
Just read your WHY newsletter for the first time. Some excellent stuff there. I will continue reading, hoping for ideas we can
use here in Northern Ontario. Keep up the good work, and all the best in your studies. -Bob Weight
Kathleen and Charley, you both are wonderful and lovely, and I wish I could give you both giant hugs. The W.H.Y in my inbox
every season is one of the only reasons I check it. I will definitely submit something sometime soon. -Emma Prestwich
Congratulations on your second anniversary!!! I am particularly grateful for this issue for its breadth and depth: the articles
are deeply personal, inspiringly honest, and incredibly humorous. I enjoyed it immensely! Thank you for providing this
wonderful forum for youth and young adults in our church to connect and reflect with one another: YOU ROCK!!!! -Shawna
Gibbons
PARTING WORDS:
Well, that’s all folks. You have reached the end. Or, soon will. If this paragraph would just end…
but it doesn’t. We’d like to send out a great big thank-you-amungo to our guest writers– Nico
Anderson, Allan Buckingham, and Jeff Poynter, as well as to our fabulous photographers, Carmen
Lansdowne, Bruce Edwards and Gord Spence (http://www.flickr.com/photos/rev_aviator/). We
couldn’t do this without you guys.
As for everyone else, now that school is done, and you have finished reading this fabulous news-
letter, perhaps you might have some time to write an article for our next issue? We would defi-
nitely recommend it. Also, maybe you get a new camera for Christmas, and have taken some
wonderful photographs— why not take a few extra seconds to send them to us, or even a link to
you Facebook (where we know you’re probably already putting your photo’s) and let us steal
them off of there! Once you’re done, send them to us at wonderingholyyouth@gmail.com
Well, that’s all folks. For real this time! Have a merry merry Christmas!!!
The GO Project
YOUTH: Have you ever wondered what it would be like to serve a community outside of your own experience?
YOUTH LEADERS: Have you ever been frustrated at the lack of mission and outreach possibilities geared towards the teachings and theology of your ministry?
PARENTS: Have you craved for your young person to have a deeper sense of service that is grown in the radical roots and fertile soil of Jesus’ ministry?
CONGREGATIONS: Have you longed to discover how you might discern the needs of your own community?
THE GO PROJECT is a Youth Mission Program organized for the wider church by Islington United Church. It is a response to years of discernment from various young peoples experiences of mission and outreach programs. While there are fantastic programs available, there are few that respond to the unique ministry of the United Church of Canada and their partners.
YOUTH GRADE 9 TO AGE 19 and their leaders will have an opportunity to serve the communities of Islington, in the west end of Toronto and downtown Halifax in the summer of 2009, while practicing the gifts of discernment, youth listen to the needs of their own community while serving in another.
BE IMMERSED in these active and growing communities for 10 days, from July 6-16 (Toronto) or July 20-30 (Halifax)
COME be a part of this change:
- Participate in a community-focused children’s program
- Reach out to youth through community programming, shelters and street cafes
- Support seniors and newcomers through community clean up and home projects
- Practice pastoral skills through visiting
- Serve the basic needs of community members through the food bank and clothing share programs
- Learn about and care for the environment through community action and awareness programs
CONTACT: Michael Shewburg at 416.239.1131x31
Email: thegoproject@islingtonunited.org
www.islingtonunited.org/goproject
LISTEN: WHAT PAST PARTICIPANTS AND LEADERS HAVE SAID
FROM PREVIOUS PARTICIPANTS
Mission has no borders, nor limitations or barriers. I learned that it starts with one, someone like me. I learned that the pull that I thought I felt to come here was God pulling me to mission. Yes, I have faith that God is leading me to a life of mission, through this experience, I am almost sure of it! I learned to Listen for to God's voice in my life words and re-discovered how to serve my community. I was encouraged to Pause from my everyday life to take a deeper look into the world and community around me; I really saw how I can make a difference. I Prayed by serving god in my own way and found the courage to use the gifts that I have received from God. I am ready to pass on the new love that has been given to me. I am ready to Repeat this experience by passing on what I have discovered in my community, and within my every day life.
FROM ADULT LEADERS:
I was privileged to attend GO as a leader/support to youth in Saskatchewan. I think this program is really valuable to the ministry that I do with others throughout the year, and know that the experience for the youth who I attended with can be integrated more meaningfully and intentionally into our local experiences, now that we have returned home. I encourage leaders to attend the GO Project with youth from their regions.
HOW THE GO PROJECT CONTINUES TO TRANSFORM LIVES:
It's been one year since I participated in the GO project mission experience. It was a phenomenal opportunity to learn about serving, volunteering, and leadership while building friendships and memories, which I still hold to a year later. On the GO project, I discovered mission isn't just about traveling abroad (to Toronto or oversees), but in a broader sense, it is about being present in the lives of others. My experience with the GO Project led me to a trip I took this past summer to work in a Ukrainian orphanage. With the creative ideas I came home with from Toronto, as well as confidence in myself, I have been able to truly understand the value of changing my mindset from "me" to "we."
YOUTH LEADERS: Have you ever been frustrated at the lack of mission and outreach possibilities geared towards the teachings and theology of your ministry?
PARENTS: Have you craved for your young person to have a deeper sense of service that is grown in the radical roots and fertile soil of Jesus’ ministry?
CONGREGATIONS: Have you longed to discover how you might discern the needs of your own community?
THE GO PROJECT is a Youth Mission Program organized for the wider church by Islington United Church. It is a response to years of discernment from various young peoples experiences of mission and outreach programs. While there are fantastic programs available, there are few that respond to the unique ministry of the United Church of Canada and their partners.
YOUTH GRADE 9 TO AGE 19 and their leaders will have an opportunity to serve the communities of Islington, in the west end of Toronto and downtown Halifax in the summer of 2009, while practicing the gifts of discernment, youth listen to the needs of their own community while serving in another.
BE IMMERSED in these active and growing communities for 10 days, from July 6-16 (Toronto) or July 20-30 (Halifax)
COME be a part of this change:
- Participate in a community-focused children’s program
- Reach out to youth through community programming, shelters and street cafes
- Support seniors and newcomers through community clean up and home projects
- Practice pastoral skills through visiting
- Serve the basic needs of community members through the food bank and clothing share programs
- Learn about and care for the environment through community action and awareness programs
CONTACT: Michael Shewburg at 416.239.1131x31
Email: thegoproject@islingtonunited.org
www.islingtonunited.org/goproject
LISTEN: WHAT PAST PARTICIPANTS AND LEADERS HAVE SAID
FROM PREVIOUS PARTICIPANTS
Mission has no borders, nor limitations or barriers. I learned that it starts with one, someone like me. I learned that the pull that I thought I felt to come here was God pulling me to mission. Yes, I have faith that God is leading me to a life of mission, through this experience, I am almost sure of it! I learned to Listen for to God's voice in my life words and re-discovered how to serve my community. I was encouraged to Pause from my everyday life to take a deeper look into the world and community around me; I really saw how I can make a difference. I Prayed by serving god in my own way and found the courage to use the gifts that I have received from God. I am ready to pass on the new love that has been given to me. I am ready to Repeat this experience by passing on what I have discovered in my community, and within my every day life.
FROM ADULT LEADERS:
I was privileged to attend GO as a leader/support to youth in Saskatchewan. I think this program is really valuable to the ministry that I do with others throughout the year, and know that the experience for the youth who I attended with can be integrated more meaningfully and intentionally into our local experiences, now that we have returned home. I encourage leaders to attend the GO Project with youth from their regions.
HOW THE GO PROJECT CONTINUES TO TRANSFORM LIVES:
It's been one year since I participated in the GO project mission experience. It was a phenomenal opportunity to learn about serving, volunteering, and leadership while building friendships and memories, which I still hold to a year later. On the GO project, I discovered mission isn't just about traveling abroad (to Toronto or oversees), but in a broader sense, it is about being present in the lives of others. My experience with the GO Project led me to a trip I took this past summer to work in a Ukrainian orphanage. With the creative ideas I came home with from Toronto, as well as confidence in myself, I have been able to truly understand the value of changing my mindset from "me" to "we."
Youth Forum 2009
WHAT'S IT ALL ABOUT?
Add your voice and make a difference: Youth Forum is a meeting of United Church youth from across Canada. It takes place during General Council, which is a gathering of representatives who make decisions and set policies for the United Church of Canada.
Spin your faith: Youth Forum is an inclusive and diverse place where you will explore your faith and learn more about yourself in the United Church of Canada.
Spin your church: As a participant of Youth Forum, you have the opportunity to join in this work. You won’t be able to vote on the issues, but you will lend your voice and your opinion to the church’s decision-making process.
INTERESTED IN YOUTH FORUM?
Youth forum is for people:
15-20 years of age by August 6. 09
A member or adherent of the United Church of Canada
Excited to explore issues of faith and church with peers across the country!
Each presbytery/district can select one delegate to sent to Youth Forum–apply to them to attend.
Grab an application form and submit it to your presbytery/district by the deadline:
February 1. 09
You will find out if you have been selected by: May 15. 09
HOW MUCH DOES IT COST?
There is no fee to attend this event. Your flight, food, and accommodation will be covered by the national church. You may want to bring some spending money for souvenirs or special snacks, but this is optional.
CALLING ALL LEADERS!
The Youth Forum Design Team is seeking folks 19 years and beyond who are enthusiastic about youth ministry to help animate our Youth Forum program! If you’re interested in knowing more about this incredible volunteer experience, visit our website for more information and application forms. References and a clear Criminal Record Check will be required for all folks on the Youth Forum Leadership Team.
FOR MORE INFORMATION:
www. united-church.ca/allages/youth
Or Contact: Karen Bridges and Adam Hanley
Design Team Co-Chairs
youthforum2009@yahoo.ca
780.975.4368
Add your voice and make a difference: Youth Forum is a meeting of United Church youth from across Canada. It takes place during General Council, which is a gathering of representatives who make decisions and set policies for the United Church of Canada.
Spin your faith: Youth Forum is an inclusive and diverse place where you will explore your faith and learn more about yourself in the United Church of Canada.
Spin your church: As a participant of Youth Forum, you have the opportunity to join in this work. You won’t be able to vote on the issues, but you will lend your voice and your opinion to the church’s decision-making process.
INTERESTED IN YOUTH FORUM?
Youth forum is for people:
15-20 years of age by August 6. 09
A member or adherent of the United Church of Canada
Excited to explore issues of faith and church with peers across the country!
Each presbytery/district can select one delegate to sent to Youth Forum–apply to them to attend.
Grab an application form and submit it to your presbytery/district by the deadline:
February 1. 09
You will find out if you have been selected by: May 15. 09
HOW MUCH DOES IT COST?
There is no fee to attend this event. Your flight, food, and accommodation will be covered by the national church. You may want to bring some spending money for souvenirs or special snacks, but this is optional.
CALLING ALL LEADERS!
The Youth Forum Design Team is seeking folks 19 years and beyond who are enthusiastic about youth ministry to help animate our Youth Forum program! If you’re interested in knowing more about this incredible volunteer experience, visit our website for more information and application forms. References and a clear Criminal Record Check will be required for all folks on the Youth Forum Leadership Team.
FOR MORE INFORMATION:
www. united-church.ca/allages/youth
Or Contact: Karen Bridges and Adam Hanley
Design Team Co-Chairs
youthforum2009@yahoo.ca
780.975.4368
A Few Holiday Reading Suggestions
PLAY ~ BELONG ~ TRANSFORM
Back in 2007, W.H.Y. brought you an article about the GO project. For Chris Giffen and Jessie Negropontes, this project involved a six-month trip from Victoria to Toronto. Along the way, they engaged congregations and communities through workshops, intergenerational worship services and conference and youth programs. Part of their goal was to re-imagine mission across the country for the United Church of Canada. This was (and is) no easy feat.
“Some of the most important things we learnt became clear early on in the journey:
We need to challenge the habit in our church of segregating youth to the basement. Often, con-
gregations would assume that, because we have training in youth ministry, theGOproject was
something only for youth, and that we would not have relevance to the rest of the community.
Thus, we had to make it clear that we did not want theGOproject to be a “basement tour.”
It’s a false assumption that all elders are resistant to change, and that all young people want to
abandon tradition. Worship shouldn’t be a piecemeal attempt to please various age groups. We
committed ourselves to choosing content that was appropriate for our purpose. We had our own
gifts to offer, and our own personal wisdom and stories to share.”
Play Belong Transform is a compilation of their GO project experiences, but more importantly it is a rich resource full of games, music, stories, and worship ideas. Highlights include a weekend youth retreat program, creative tools for engaging with scripture, experiments in Faith, Justice, and Creativity with young adults, and holistic youth ministry practices. While the book is full of amazing ideas, it also is full of inspiration to kick start your own creativity!
Best of all, this resource is FREE until August 2009! Visit www.playbelongtransform.ca to download your copy now.
A LITTLE PLUG FOR DAVID GIULIANO'S NEW BOOK!
David Giuliano, moderator of the United Church and possibly our biggest hero ever, has written a new book which we highly recommend you add to your ‘Christmas reading’ pile. Postcards from the Valley: Encounters with Fear, Faith, and God, includes previously published articles and some of Giuliano’s regular blog postings from wondercafe.ca.
“As a community we are learning about the ‘valley of shadows’ after a history spent primarily on top of the world. We are experiencing tremendous change and loss as a community. The church we have known and loved is dying,” writes Giuliano. “Death is always part of transformation. We don’t know where it will lead, but we do know that we no longer claim special authority and place in our culture. For a long time we rode a great white charger. Now we are learning to ride the donkey. There is confusion, denial, and pain, as well as hope, in our body. I think we are closer to Jesus.”
Check out www.chapters.com to order your copy!
(**Editor’s Note: We haven’t actually read this book yet and would certainly welcome a full review for our next issue!)
Back in 2007, W.H.Y. brought you an article about the GO project. For Chris Giffen and Jessie Negropontes, this project involved a six-month trip from Victoria to Toronto. Along the way, they engaged congregations and communities through workshops, intergenerational worship services and conference and youth programs. Part of their goal was to re-imagine mission across the country for the United Church of Canada. This was (and is) no easy feat.
“Some of the most important things we learnt became clear early on in the journey:
We need to challenge the habit in our church of segregating youth to the basement. Often, con-
gregations would assume that, because we have training in youth ministry, theGOproject was
something only for youth, and that we would not have relevance to the rest of the community.
Thus, we had to make it clear that we did not want theGOproject to be a “basement tour.”
It’s a false assumption that all elders are resistant to change, and that all young people want to
abandon tradition. Worship shouldn’t be a piecemeal attempt to please various age groups. We
committed ourselves to choosing content that was appropriate for our purpose. We had our own
gifts to offer, and our own personal wisdom and stories to share.”
Play Belong Transform is a compilation of their GO project experiences, but more importantly it is a rich resource full of games, music, stories, and worship ideas. Highlights include a weekend youth retreat program, creative tools for engaging with scripture, experiments in Faith, Justice, and Creativity with young adults, and holistic youth ministry practices. While the book is full of amazing ideas, it also is full of inspiration to kick start your own creativity!
Best of all, this resource is FREE until August 2009! Visit www.playbelongtransform.ca to download your copy now.
A LITTLE PLUG FOR DAVID GIULIANO'S NEW BOOK!
David Giuliano, moderator of the United Church and possibly our biggest hero ever, has written a new book which we highly recommend you add to your ‘Christmas reading’ pile. Postcards from the Valley: Encounters with Fear, Faith, and God, includes previously published articles and some of Giuliano’s regular blog postings from wondercafe.ca.
“As a community we are learning about the ‘valley of shadows’ after a history spent primarily on top of the world. We are experiencing tremendous change and loss as a community. The church we have known and loved is dying,” writes Giuliano. “Death is always part of transformation. We don’t know where it will lead, but we do know that we no longer claim special authority and place in our culture. For a long time we rode a great white charger. Now we are learning to ride the donkey. There is confusion, denial, and pain, as well as hope, in our body. I think we are closer to Jesus.”
Check out www.chapters.com to order your copy!
(**Editor’s Note: We haven’t actually read this book yet and would certainly welcome a full review for our next issue!)
Tuesday, October 14, 2008
Happy Birthday To Us (Again)
Well guys (and by guys I mean both boys and girls) it is fall. You may have gotten that already, by the fact you are back in school, or the fact you find yourself wearing your coat when going outside, or by the fact everyone seems just a little bit less happy. Or maybe you, like me, are in denial. Well peoples (a much less gender specific word than "guys") it is in fact fall. In caps, and bold, just so that we make sure everyone catches it: IT IS FALL! Sorry to burst your summer bubble. Now, lower yourself back to the ground carefully—for fall is certainly not worth hurting yourself over-- and let’s get on with it.
The good news is that we have the cure for those fall blues—it's a little something that we like to call the Second Anniversary Issue of a little newsletter called Wondering Holy Youth... which you are in fact now reading, and so it should be nice and handy for you.
We would like to point out three very exciting words in the previous paragraph in case you missed them—Second Anniversary Issue— that's right folks (again, non gender specific) we are turning two years old this issue! Wow! Who would have guessed that we would make it this far? We want to say a great big thanks to all the people who have been reading W.H.Y. Your support, encouragement and feedback has helped us reach this point. Which is pretty sweet.
Speaking of pretty sweet, we were featured in the September issue of the Observer, so you should definitely check us out if you haven't already. We were interviewed and had to go to a photo shoot and everything—it’s probably the closest we’ll ever be to fame!
We would now like to share a funny story with you, which has little to do with anything. On the weekend of the photo shoot, we decided that we should hang out for a bit, as we had not seen each other in nearly a year. We went out for supper at a restaurant, and on the menu was a rather interesting item— Alligator Kabobs. Which of course we had to try. Turns out alligator is surprisingly delicious, tasting much like sausage or chicken or a number of other things we were unable to agree on. Which then lead to many alligator themed jokes, as well as the possibility of an alligator themed issue of WHY (which was quickly shot down by Charley, though still lives in Kathleen's dreams).
Anyways, I think this shall end the longest W.H.Y. intro in history. Have a great fall and enjoy this issue. Be sure to check out guest writers Nico Anderson and Cory Bentley and our guest photographers Richelle and Rick. We'll be back in December!
-Charley and Kathleen
The good news is that we have the cure for those fall blues—it's a little something that we like to call the Second Anniversary Issue of a little newsletter called Wondering Holy Youth... which you are in fact now reading, and so it should be nice and handy for you.
We would like to point out three very exciting words in the previous paragraph in case you missed them—Second Anniversary Issue— that's right folks (again, non gender specific) we are turning two years old this issue! Wow! Who would have guessed that we would make it this far? We want to say a great big thanks to all the people who have been reading W.H.Y. Your support, encouragement and feedback has helped us reach this point. Which is pretty sweet.
Speaking of pretty sweet, we were featured in the September issue of the Observer, so you should definitely check us out if you haven't already. We were interviewed and had to go to a photo shoot and everything—it’s probably the closest we’ll ever be to fame!
We would now like to share a funny story with you, which has little to do with anything. On the weekend of the photo shoot, we decided that we should hang out for a bit, as we had not seen each other in nearly a year. We went out for supper at a restaurant, and on the menu was a rather interesting item— Alligator Kabobs. Which of course we had to try. Turns out alligator is surprisingly delicious, tasting much like sausage or chicken or a number of other things we were unable to agree on. Which then lead to many alligator themed jokes, as well as the possibility of an alligator themed issue of WHY (which was quickly shot down by Charley, though still lives in Kathleen's dreams).
Anyways, I think this shall end the longest W.H.Y. intro in history. Have a great fall and enjoy this issue. Be sure to check out guest writers Nico Anderson and Cory Bentley and our guest photographers Richelle and Rick. We'll be back in December!
-Charley and Kathleen
Living With My Brokenness
There are times when I feel like I have an emptiness inside me, a gap I just can’t seem to fill with anything. I feel lonely and empty. I can surround my self with a multitude of activities to keep myself occupied. None of them help though. Have you ever felt that way? I’m sure lots of people do. Whenever I feel like this, and nothing else seems to be working, I try praying. I must admit, it can be a great help.
Prayer helps to open you up to something that can help you even more. God’s everlasting and constant love. I don’t know about you, but I often find that I forget to pray. I just let the void, the loneliness, grow and grow until it seems to be so big that it hurts. It seems like it shall never again go away. It’s like it has made a nest inside of me, like it has made a home inside of me—constantly reminding me that it is there and that it has no intention to leave.
An unknown, yet still wise, person once said “God understands our prayers even when we can't find the words to say them.” Perhaps in these times, when we can’t find the words to pray, or forget to pray to God, maybe we don’t need to say anything. Maybe, just maybe, all we need to do is reach out to the Heavenly Father, the Heavenly Mother, and God will take us in His loving arms in a huge hug and sooth our troubled spirits.
What if that doesn’t seem to work, though? What if we can’t seem to feel that loving, tender touch? Do you often go searching for God, to ask Him to help you? Of course, some people claim to have found God in these instances. Another anonymous person once said, “Some people talk about finding God—as if He could get lost.” No, God doesn’t get lost. But we feel lost. Or at least I know that I do. As I’ve written before, I often feel like a puzzle, broken and scattered about and I just can’t seem to put myself back together again.
Amethyst Snow-Rivers remarked, “When we can't piece together the puzzle of our own lives, remember the best view of a puzzle is from above. Let Him help put you together.” Perhaps if we cannot ‘find God’, we should let God find us. We can give God a call, a cry out with our soul to God. I think that when he receives this calling cry, He’ll come to us with a box in hand. With a soft, kind and caring smile He’ll kneel next to us and say in a gentle and loving voice say, “My child, my dear child, I have heard you calling to me. And look! Do you see what I have? I have those missing puzzle pieces. I can help you to become whole once more. Do not worry…I am here and I love you so very much.”
I have just finished a week at Kairos 2008, which is an event for young adults in the United Church of Canada from across the country to get together and live in a week of worship, discernment, and community. It is a profound experience. With this group of wonderful and amazing people I have found the true meaning of what it is for God to put a single piece of the puzzle back. Even if we can’t see it right away, He answers our prayers. I’ve learned that this week. Before and on my way to Kairos, I found myself feeling very empty and much like a broken spirit.
I can never claim that I’m not still a broken spirit, I think I always will be. On my way to this event, I prayed to God and asked Him to help me feel whole and understand why I am living. And through this event, one or two things that I have suffered in my life have come to surface, as I am sure God intended. For instance, I’ve dealt with having practically no presence of my father during most of my life. I’ve never lived with him, but I have met him. He cut off all communications with me when I was at the age of about, I’ll say, six. With all these amazing people, though, I’ve discovered something. I’ve discovered that I don’t need my father. I don’t know if ever need him. Someday I may have closure, but until then, I’m happy with the extended family that I have grown into through this event and events like this.
I have felt love and acceptance here…enough to fill that void and to know I am loved, that I am good enough, no matter how inadequate I have felt because of my father’s absence; no matter how imperfect or unworthy I have felt because of it. I now know what it means to have your prayers answered. I know what it means to feel loved and accepted for who I am in all of my brokenness. All that I can do now is give the Lord thankful praise as tears stream down my face. It is the happiest I have been in the longest time.
Thank you Heavenly Father…Heavenly Mother. I may not be perfect, but with Your grace I can be perfectly happy.
Amen.
-Nico Anderson
Prayer helps to open you up to something that can help you even more. God’s everlasting and constant love. I don’t know about you, but I often find that I forget to pray. I just let the void, the loneliness, grow and grow until it seems to be so big that it hurts. It seems like it shall never again go away. It’s like it has made a nest inside of me, like it has made a home inside of me—constantly reminding me that it is there and that it has no intention to leave.
An unknown, yet still wise, person once said “God understands our prayers even when we can't find the words to say them.” Perhaps in these times, when we can’t find the words to pray, or forget to pray to God, maybe we don’t need to say anything. Maybe, just maybe, all we need to do is reach out to the Heavenly Father, the Heavenly Mother, and God will take us in His loving arms in a huge hug and sooth our troubled spirits.
What if that doesn’t seem to work, though? What if we can’t seem to feel that loving, tender touch? Do you often go searching for God, to ask Him to help you? Of course, some people claim to have found God in these instances. Another anonymous person once said, “Some people talk about finding God—as if He could get lost.” No, God doesn’t get lost. But we feel lost. Or at least I know that I do. As I’ve written before, I often feel like a puzzle, broken and scattered about and I just can’t seem to put myself back together again.
Amethyst Snow-Rivers remarked, “When we can't piece together the puzzle of our own lives, remember the best view of a puzzle is from above. Let Him help put you together.” Perhaps if we cannot ‘find God’, we should let God find us. We can give God a call, a cry out with our soul to God. I think that when he receives this calling cry, He’ll come to us with a box in hand. With a soft, kind and caring smile He’ll kneel next to us and say in a gentle and loving voice say, “My child, my dear child, I have heard you calling to me. And look! Do you see what I have? I have those missing puzzle pieces. I can help you to become whole once more. Do not worry…I am here and I love you so very much.”
I have just finished a week at Kairos 2008, which is an event for young adults in the United Church of Canada from across the country to get together and live in a week of worship, discernment, and community. It is a profound experience. With this group of wonderful and amazing people I have found the true meaning of what it is for God to put a single piece of the puzzle back. Even if we can’t see it right away, He answers our prayers. I’ve learned that this week. Before and on my way to Kairos, I found myself feeling very empty and much like a broken spirit.
I can never claim that I’m not still a broken spirit, I think I always will be. On my way to this event, I prayed to God and asked Him to help me feel whole and understand why I am living. And through this event, one or two things that I have suffered in my life have come to surface, as I am sure God intended. For instance, I’ve dealt with having practically no presence of my father during most of my life. I’ve never lived with him, but I have met him. He cut off all communications with me when I was at the age of about, I’ll say, six. With all these amazing people, though, I’ve discovered something. I’ve discovered that I don’t need my father. I don’t know if ever need him. Someday I may have closure, but until then, I’m happy with the extended family that I have grown into through this event and events like this.
I have felt love and acceptance here…enough to fill that void and to know I am loved, that I am good enough, no matter how inadequate I have felt because of my father’s absence; no matter how imperfect or unworthy I have felt because of it. I now know what it means to have your prayers answered. I know what it means to feel loved and accepted for who I am in all of my brokenness. All that I can do now is give the Lord thankful praise as tears stream down my face. It is the happiest I have been in the longest time.
Thank you Heavenly Father…Heavenly Mother. I may not be perfect, but with Your grace I can be perfectly happy.
Amen.
-Nico Anderson
Tonight I Pray
Dear God, who has created and is creating, tonight I have to pray for me. While I know I should pray for all the others, tonight I can’t. I have to pray for my own salvation. I ask that You take some of the fears from my heart. I ask that You remove some of the impossibilities from my future, the challenges of my present, and the pain from my past, and hold them with You. I ask for some of the answers I am looking for. I ask that You heal some of the pain in my heart
You are the Lord of my parents, my grandparents, and of myself. The God who has created this amazing place. You are the God who tonight I must believe in . The God who I ask to save me.
-Kathleen Kerr
A friend of mine once asked her minister how to pray. The answer? To talk as though someone was listening.
Which is immensely interesting to me. The idea that to pray is to simply talk as though there is someone out there listening. Not to worry about all the niceties, the Amen’s or the Hallelujah's. Rather, to just talk like maybe you’re speaking to a friend or maybe a stranger, but just to say all the things you need someone to hear. You can share your brokenness and pain, along with your joys and gladness as well. You would never have to be lonely.
So just speak, and see where it takes you.
-Kathleen Kerr
You are the Lord of my parents, my grandparents, and of myself. The God who has created this amazing place. You are the God who tonight I must believe in . The God who I ask to save me.
-Kathleen Kerr
A friend of mine once asked her minister how to pray. The answer? To talk as though someone was listening.
Which is immensely interesting to me. The idea that to pray is to simply talk as though there is someone out there listening. Not to worry about all the niceties, the Amen’s or the Hallelujah's. Rather, to just talk like maybe you’re speaking to a friend or maybe a stranger, but just to say all the things you need someone to hear. You can share your brokenness and pain, along with your joys and gladness as well. You would never have to be lonely.
So just speak, and see where it takes you.
-Kathleen Kerr
Things that I Have Learned
Summer is over. I am currently on a plane somewhere over Saskatchewan . I have only had an hour’s sleep in the past thirty seven hours. So I may be slightly nuts. But somewhere in me I know that as soon as this plane hits the ground, my summer will be officially over. My roommate has moved in this week while I have been in Ontario (at Kairos with Nico). I only have this weekend before school starts. And I only have this airplane ride before real life starts again. Putting my life into perspective, these are some of the things I have learned this summer:
I have learned that you can only change so much. At a certain point you have to learn to be happy with you who are and stop trying to change into the person you want to be. I have always been a firm believer that people can change, and that there is no limit on the change that a person could enact within themselves. I am realizing that this isn’t true. There is a part of me saying I am simply giving up on this ideal because I can’t do it, I can’t become who I wanted to be. But the rest of me is saying that this is a maturing into myself, into learning to like who I am now rather than who I could be.
I have learned to choose my friends wisely. I have learned that I can do better than following someone around. I have learned that I deserve someone who likes me all the time rather than when it suits them. This summer I have found the best friends in those whom I least expected too. I have made many good friends this summer. And I made a couple of bad decisions in who to hang out with. But ultimately I learned that a really good friend is the best thing you can find.
I have learned to make mistakes and to find the wisdom in them. I have learned everyone makes mistakes, everyone makes bad choices, but we need to move from them. I have learned to find the wisdom and the holy in the mistakes that I have made.
Now I must find where to go from here. I must learn to let go of my summer without forgetting these things I know now. I have to find a way to move on with my life after my plane lands. Because all I want to do is put my life on hold for a day or a week or a month, but I know I can’t do this. Life always moves forward. And I have no idea how to do this. But I have half and hour before we hit the ground and so maybe (just maybe) by then I will figure it out. -Kathleen Kerr
I have learned that you can only change so much. At a certain point you have to learn to be happy with you who are and stop trying to change into the person you want to be. I have always been a firm believer that people can change, and that there is no limit on the change that a person could enact within themselves. I am realizing that this isn’t true. There is a part of me saying I am simply giving up on this ideal because I can’t do it, I can’t become who I wanted to be. But the rest of me is saying that this is a maturing into myself, into learning to like who I am now rather than who I could be.
I have learned to choose my friends wisely. I have learned that I can do better than following someone around. I have learned that I deserve someone who likes me all the time rather than when it suits them. This summer I have found the best friends in those whom I least expected too. I have made many good friends this summer. And I made a couple of bad decisions in who to hang out with. But ultimately I learned that a really good friend is the best thing you can find.
I have learned to make mistakes and to find the wisdom in them. I have learned everyone makes mistakes, everyone makes bad choices, but we need to move from them. I have learned to find the wisdom and the holy in the mistakes that I have made.
Now I must find where to go from here. I must learn to let go of my summer without forgetting these things I know now. I have to find a way to move on with my life after my plane lands. Because all I want to do is put my life on hold for a day or a week or a month, but I know I can’t do this. Life always moves forward. And I have no idea how to do this. But I have half and hour before we hit the ground and so maybe (just maybe) by then I will figure it out. -Kathleen Kerr
Consider the Following
My topic today: what builds a church? Wood, rocks, and stain-glass windows? When we hear the word “church,” most of us think of a big shiny building featuring copious amounts of each of these and other expensive materials. Tall and grand, the wide church doors are generally expected to welcome their masses onto red carpets and into long, uncomfortable wooden pews, to be seated before a majestic organ system adorned with stain-glass windows and a cross big enough to have crucified Goliath.
Okay, let’s be realistic. Most United Churches aren’t this spiffy. So why do we still love them? What is it about a church that truly designates it as a sacred space? Going a little further, if we had to completely demolish every church and reconstruct them on a tight budget, what would we resurrect first? A question similar to this one was asked at Kairos 2008 this August, with around 80 people were lucky enough to get the week off work to attend. The results from this crowd were paradigm-shifting. Here are some of the key conclusions:
Almost nobody mentioned the building as being important.
Little or no priority was given to obtaining money.
The size of the mass was not a large concern.
In fact, the preference was on small, intimate, individual masses as opposed to one large mass. The biggest concerns were related to people: importance was placed on inclusiveness, community outreach, and open doors (or lack thereof, if you’re going with no building). Tearing down walls is better than putting them up, but what about rain and snow? While there was a lot of excitement around the idea of having outdoor services, weather issues were staved with the concept of holding services in the homes of church members. Not necessarily Bob’s place, but Sue’s one week and Wendy’s the next. The idea of having worship over a meal was introduced and hardly contested. Even the music department was opened to some new ideas—not every United churchgoer has a pipe organ in their basement. And hey, who said we had to stick with Sunday mornings? It certainly does sound like a radically different church, but could it really support a mass? Let’s consider the pros and cons.
The pros: it’s new, it’s different, it’s thinking outside the box. This revolutionary out-of-doors church is sure to raise some eyebrows, perhaps enough to attract newcomers who are afraid of enclosed shrines and large crowds. After all, squeezing between two old ladies to join a sea of unfamiliar faces in singing “retro” tunes on a Sunday morning may be a bit much for a green-horned youth looking to wet his or her spiritual feet. The secure, toned-down nature of a small group talking about God over drumsticks and Saint-Saëns symphonies (on an iPod, not an orchestra) would likely be more conducive to attracting new and more youthful members. Of course, it’s also much less expensive, and as the United Church is starting to learn: you can’t have your church and heat it, too.
The cons: it’s new, it’s different, it’s outside the box! Quite a few of us have been in the church our entire lives, and have come to truly appreciate the spiritual shelter it offers—as it is. To take that away from our veteran members now sounds awfully mean. It means the church is going to shrink very quickly over the next couple decades, but hardship is part of the cycle of the church, right? Will our perseverance in keeping the church the way it always has been traditionally not pay off in the end? The United Church has done great things as a United body, and to separate that body doesn’t sound very conducive to survival. Generally, one doesn’t separate their limbs in hopes of living longer. Unless one of those limbs has cancer...okay, so it isn’t a perfect analogy, but you get where I’m going. United we stand, divided we are conquered; conquered by sin, conquered by conflict, conquered by “I’ll just sleep in today and go next Sunday with twice the spunk.”
So there you have it. A vision of the future? A pipe dream? A generally bad idea? It’s up to you to decide.
-Cory Bentley
A Note from Cory.
Cory here. Nice to meet ya. This is my first time writing an article for WHY, but if all goes well I plan to throw in my contribution more often. So I just want to specify one thing: I’m not writing opinion pieces, my only intention is to bring up interesting or controversial subjects. You know, just to get you thinking (though I’m sure you do plenty of that already). I’ll be writing in a fashion as non-biased as possible, and in an effort to equally present both sides of any issue. The objective: you (yes you, in front of the computer) get to think it out, make an opinion, and debate it with other WHY readers or fellow church-going theologians. Sound good? I hope so, ‘cause if it doesn’t then you won’t like my articles very much. :P
Okay, let’s be realistic. Most United Churches aren’t this spiffy. So why do we still love them? What is it about a church that truly designates it as a sacred space? Going a little further, if we had to completely demolish every church and reconstruct them on a tight budget, what would we resurrect first? A question similar to this one was asked at Kairos 2008 this August, with around 80 people were lucky enough to get the week off work to attend. The results from this crowd were paradigm-shifting. Here are some of the key conclusions:
Almost nobody mentioned the building as being important.
Little or no priority was given to obtaining money.
The size of the mass was not a large concern.
In fact, the preference was on small, intimate, individual masses as opposed to one large mass. The biggest concerns were related to people: importance was placed on inclusiveness, community outreach, and open doors (or lack thereof, if you’re going with no building). Tearing down walls is better than putting them up, but what about rain and snow? While there was a lot of excitement around the idea of having outdoor services, weather issues were staved with the concept of holding services in the homes of church members. Not necessarily Bob’s place, but Sue’s one week and Wendy’s the next. The idea of having worship over a meal was introduced and hardly contested. Even the music department was opened to some new ideas—not every United churchgoer has a pipe organ in their basement. And hey, who said we had to stick with Sunday mornings? It certainly does sound like a radically different church, but could it really support a mass? Let’s consider the pros and cons.
The pros: it’s new, it’s different, it’s thinking outside the box. This revolutionary out-of-doors church is sure to raise some eyebrows, perhaps enough to attract newcomers who are afraid of enclosed shrines and large crowds. After all, squeezing between two old ladies to join a sea of unfamiliar faces in singing “retro” tunes on a Sunday morning may be a bit much for a green-horned youth looking to wet his or her spiritual feet. The secure, toned-down nature of a small group talking about God over drumsticks and Saint-Saëns symphonies (on an iPod, not an orchestra) would likely be more conducive to attracting new and more youthful members. Of course, it’s also much less expensive, and as the United Church is starting to learn: you can’t have your church and heat it, too.
The cons: it’s new, it’s different, it’s outside the box! Quite a few of us have been in the church our entire lives, and have come to truly appreciate the spiritual shelter it offers—as it is. To take that away from our veteran members now sounds awfully mean. It means the church is going to shrink very quickly over the next couple decades, but hardship is part of the cycle of the church, right? Will our perseverance in keeping the church the way it always has been traditionally not pay off in the end? The United Church has done great things as a United body, and to separate that body doesn’t sound very conducive to survival. Generally, one doesn’t separate their limbs in hopes of living longer. Unless one of those limbs has cancer...okay, so it isn’t a perfect analogy, but you get where I’m going. United we stand, divided we are conquered; conquered by sin, conquered by conflict, conquered by “I’ll just sleep in today and go next Sunday with twice the spunk.”
So there you have it. A vision of the future? A pipe dream? A generally bad idea? It’s up to you to decide.
-Cory Bentley
A Note from Cory.
Cory here. Nice to meet ya. This is my first time writing an article for WHY, but if all goes well I plan to throw in my contribution more often. So I just want to specify one thing: I’m not writing opinion pieces, my only intention is to bring up interesting or controversial subjects. You know, just to get you thinking (though I’m sure you do plenty of that already). I’ll be writing in a fashion as non-biased as possible, and in an effort to equally present both sides of any issue. The objective: you (yes you, in front of the computer) get to think it out, make an opinion, and debate it with other WHY readers or fellow church-going theologians. Sound good? I hope so, ‘cause if it doesn’t then you won’t like my articles very much. :P
My Gift
My name is Nico Anderson. I have a gift. Although it is one that people appreciate in others, it is also one that meets criticism, in both direct and indirect ways. That gift is listening. Listening with both heart and mind.
This gift means, for me anyway, that I am more silent than others. Often times I spend more time listening to people rather than actually participating in conversations myself.
People often tell me that I should speak up more; they ask me to tell them what I think about various topics. I don’t always have an answer for them. Don’t get me wrong, I do talk, just not a lot. I’m doing what I do best. Listening. And not only do I listen with my mind but also with my heart. Listening with my heart, I believe, is the most important kind of listening that I can do, even in the midst of criticism.
People just don’t seem to feel comfortable with someone who is quiet. Either that or they don’t understand why I am quiet, and sometimes I feel as if people can’t understand why.
Despite being misunderstood at times, I have honoured and nurtured my gift of listening and I have learned more in listening than I would ever have done in speaking. I have heard people’s stories. I have shared in people’s lives by listening. I have learned more about the cruel realities and the wonderfully joyous celebrations that take place in everyday life.
Because of my listening I understand that, in the words of the song “Come a Long Way”, by Tons Of Fun University, “Everything beautiful about this world is right now”.
I look for the beauty in everything that I listen to. And in that beauty, I see and hear love – love that isn’t always perfect, and is often broken. And in that brokenness comes something greater…that I believe is the truest kind of love – the love of God.
Through our toughest times, our least perfect and most broken times, God shows us love, and embraces us with it. God whispers to us of how we are perfect in our brokenness, of how, no matter what, God will always love and embrace… us.
My gift is listening and I hold to the spiritual truth that God gave me this gift and with it I shall continue to listen to the beauties of life. I will continue to learn about others and experience the cruel and joyous realities of life. In listening I will share in people’s lives and meet God in those people. I shall do this despite any criticism, and I shall try my best to use this gift to its fullest.
I am Nico Anderson, and I thank you for listening – to me.
-Nico Anderson
This gift means, for me anyway, that I am more silent than others. Often times I spend more time listening to people rather than actually participating in conversations myself.
People often tell me that I should speak up more; they ask me to tell them what I think about various topics. I don’t always have an answer for them. Don’t get me wrong, I do talk, just not a lot. I’m doing what I do best. Listening. And not only do I listen with my mind but also with my heart. Listening with my heart, I believe, is the most important kind of listening that I can do, even in the midst of criticism.
People just don’t seem to feel comfortable with someone who is quiet. Either that or they don’t understand why I am quiet, and sometimes I feel as if people can’t understand why.
Despite being misunderstood at times, I have honoured and nurtured my gift of listening and I have learned more in listening than I would ever have done in speaking. I have heard people’s stories. I have shared in people’s lives by listening. I have learned more about the cruel realities and the wonderfully joyous celebrations that take place in everyday life.
Because of my listening I understand that, in the words of the song “Come a Long Way”, by Tons Of Fun University, “Everything beautiful about this world is right now”.
I look for the beauty in everything that I listen to. And in that beauty, I see and hear love – love that isn’t always perfect, and is often broken. And in that brokenness comes something greater…that I believe is the truest kind of love – the love of God.
Through our toughest times, our least perfect and most broken times, God shows us love, and embraces us with it. God whispers to us of how we are perfect in our brokenness, of how, no matter what, God will always love and embrace… us.
My gift is listening and I hold to the spiritual truth that God gave me this gift and with it I shall continue to listen to the beauties of life. I will continue to learn about others and experience the cruel and joyous realities of life. In listening I will share in people’s lives and meet God in those people. I shall do this despite any criticism, and I shall try my best to use this gift to its fullest.
I am Nico Anderson, and I thank you for listening – to me.
-Nico Anderson
Now I Lay Me Down To Sleep (Perfect Moments)
It’s the moments
When the sun finally shines
It’s those moments
As the darkness brightens
That make everything OK
So today I’ll get up again
Face this darkness that just won’t fade
Find a way to get through this
And know tomorrow I’ll do the same.
So because this is how I live
Because sometimes this is all I know
I wait for that perfect moment,
And I make it through this day.
So now I lay me down to sleep
I’ll pray to God with all I am
That tomorrow the sun will shine,
And I pray to God my soul to keep.
So if I die before I wake
Or if I wake up in the dark
Those perfect moments have to come
Tomorrow can’t be worse.
I’m living for that moment
When the sun must finally shine
I’m waiting for that perfect moment
When the darkness must finally fade.
And I’m hoping it makes everything OK.
-Kathleen Kerr
When the sun finally shines
It’s those moments
As the darkness brightens
That make everything OK
So today I’ll get up again
Face this darkness that just won’t fade
Find a way to get through this
And know tomorrow I’ll do the same.
So because this is how I live
Because sometimes this is all I know
I wait for that perfect moment,
And I make it through this day.
So now I lay me down to sleep
I’ll pray to God with all I am
That tomorrow the sun will shine,
And I pray to God my soul to keep.
So if I die before I wake
Or if I wake up in the dark
Those perfect moments have to come
Tomorrow can’t be worse.
I’m living for that moment
When the sun must finally shine
I’m waiting for that perfect moment
When the darkness must finally fade.
And I’m hoping it makes everything OK.
-Kathleen Kerr
Happy Summer to You
Its summer peoples! I know that you are all excited for a summer full of relaxing summer days. I know that I am. Summer is my favorite season. No school, no snow, no worries. My favorite part is the no worries. Summer is a time that almost seems as a pause to the hustle and bustle real life. A chance to simply relax and enjoy life. To take long holidays, or short trips just to get away. Basically, it’s a chance to live simply for the day.
This issue isn’t about anything. It doesn’t have a theme, no underlying thread. Its just a bunch of people writing what is on their heart’s. Because that’s what summer is about. No themes, no big pictures, no anything. Summer is our one chance to forget all the everythings in our lives and to renew our spirits to start fighting our battles again in the fall.
So we hope that you enjoy this issue. We enjoy making it, and it is double fun when people like reading it. It makes it triple (or maybe more) fun when people email us with feedback about our newsletter, so send us an email (our email address is wonderingholyyouth@gmail.com). As you’re amazing comments arrive, we’ll be having a party here on the other end. We want to point out our two superfantabulous guest writers, Jesse Root and Magdalena Jennings, and give them a monster thank you for doing this, and we want you all to give them a little thanks too.
Have a great summer, and we’ll be back with our 2nd anniversary issue in September 2008!
This issue isn’t about anything. It doesn’t have a theme, no underlying thread. Its just a bunch of people writing what is on their heart’s. Because that’s what summer is about. No themes, no big pictures, no anything. Summer is our one chance to forget all the everythings in our lives and to renew our spirits to start fighting our battles again in the fall.
So we hope that you enjoy this issue. We enjoy making it, and it is double fun when people like reading it. It makes it triple (or maybe more) fun when people email us with feedback about our newsletter, so send us an email (our email address is wonderingholyyouth@gmail.com). As you’re amazing comments arrive, we’ll be having a party here on the other end. We want to point out our two superfantabulous guest writers, Jesse Root and Magdalena Jennings, and give them a monster thank you for doing this, and we want you all to give them a little thanks too.
Have a great summer, and we’ll be back with our 2nd anniversary issue in September 2008!
Vison Quest at Future Quest
We clutch our journals, our water bottles, and our pens: fifteen youth sent to find a place in the woods to sit and ponder. I find a small rock under a tree in the middle of a clearing from which I can see the lake and hear the loons.
This is the first part of our Vision Quest, on the Future Quest 2007 camping trip. I am supposed to write about what makes me happy, to help me try to find my passion. As I begin my list I notice more and more how often nature is mentioned. Later those who are comfortable unofficially compare lists and on everyone’s nature appears as the thing that makes us happiest. Even those of us who live in cities can become close to nature out here and together we acknowledge an almost primeval love for the earth. At my feet a cricket begins to chirp. He falls silent when I move and so I keep still, and write a poem about him. I ponder the difference in size of our worlds, which are essentially the same one, and I wonder, as I sit here, knowing so much more, if the cricket's world is the better one. And I wonder how much more there is to my world which I don't know.
At night the members of my campsite sing camp songs and roast marshmallows. We tell stories or discuss the latest computer games and have tooth-brushing parties, spitting into a little hole in the ground. Mornings are spent just talking, perhaps about the previous night's sleep or about animal sightings. We make a fire and soon clutch cups of tea in our hands, shivering a bit in the crisp forest air. One morning we make up spiritual names for each other, matching animals or plants and specific traits to people's characters. This is done with laughter and much joking but the memory stays with me. My name is still special and meaningful to me.
Later on, we wander up to the next lake to Vision Quest once more. It is a smaller group this time, and we nestle into the grass on the steep bank of this lake to study individual objects around us. I etch every branch and curve in the tree above my head into my memory. I shut my eyes and use my other senses to try to heighten awareness. Suddenly I can feel the activity beneath me in the ground. The sap runs through the roots of the trees, and I can feel a steady rhythm in the burrowing of the worms and the beat of the warm sun and the shivering of the tree. This new attentiveness comes quickly, and with joy I open my eyes to record this moment in my journal. I look around and watch my friends with their eyes closed and suddenly I realize how much of life is not about only us. Yet an utter peace rests on us and calm emanates from us as well. When our leader begins a prayer I can fully and truly appreciate wonder and awe in God, in nature, in the people around me, and in myself.
Future Quest is an experience I will never forget. It has engraved itself in my memory, like the tree and like the cricket. It has caused me to look within myself to accept the world around me. It has brought me closer to my dreams and to an acceptance, if not an understanding, of how God works in little miracles around us every day.
A collective gasp emerges from my group in the middle of our prayer. There, floating not twenty metres off shore, is a beautiful and majestic loon. Thank you, God.
-Magdalena Jennings
This is the first part of our Vision Quest, on the Future Quest 2007 camping trip. I am supposed to write about what makes me happy, to help me try to find my passion. As I begin my list I notice more and more how often nature is mentioned. Later those who are comfortable unofficially compare lists and on everyone’s nature appears as the thing that makes us happiest. Even those of us who live in cities can become close to nature out here and together we acknowledge an almost primeval love for the earth. At my feet a cricket begins to chirp. He falls silent when I move and so I keep still, and write a poem about him. I ponder the difference in size of our worlds, which are essentially the same one, and I wonder, as I sit here, knowing so much more, if the cricket's world is the better one. And I wonder how much more there is to my world which I don't know.
At night the members of my campsite sing camp songs and roast marshmallows. We tell stories or discuss the latest computer games and have tooth-brushing parties, spitting into a little hole in the ground. Mornings are spent just talking, perhaps about the previous night's sleep or about animal sightings. We make a fire and soon clutch cups of tea in our hands, shivering a bit in the crisp forest air. One morning we make up spiritual names for each other, matching animals or plants and specific traits to people's characters. This is done with laughter and much joking but the memory stays with me. My name is still special and meaningful to me.
Later on, we wander up to the next lake to Vision Quest once more. It is a smaller group this time, and we nestle into the grass on the steep bank of this lake to study individual objects around us. I etch every branch and curve in the tree above my head into my memory. I shut my eyes and use my other senses to try to heighten awareness. Suddenly I can feel the activity beneath me in the ground. The sap runs through the roots of the trees, and I can feel a steady rhythm in the burrowing of the worms and the beat of the warm sun and the shivering of the tree. This new attentiveness comes quickly, and with joy I open my eyes to record this moment in my journal. I look around and watch my friends with their eyes closed and suddenly I realize how much of life is not about only us. Yet an utter peace rests on us and calm emanates from us as well. When our leader begins a prayer I can fully and truly appreciate wonder and awe in God, in nature, in the people around me, and in myself.
Future Quest is an experience I will never forget. It has engraved itself in my memory, like the tree and like the cricket. It has caused me to look within myself to accept the world around me. It has brought me closer to my dreams and to an acceptance, if not an understanding, of how God works in little miracles around us every day.
A collective gasp emerges from my group in the middle of our prayer. There, floating not twenty metres off shore, is a beautiful and majestic loon. Thank you, God.
-Magdalena Jennings
God Is Good?
I often wonder why we believe in a God. We live in this world where people want proof of everything. If someone is convicted of a crime, definite proof, reason beyond doubt is required to convict. Society values science and technology, and our lives revolve around these two entities. Everything in our society is based on absolute fact. But yet, here we are, believing in a God of whom we have no proof of actually existing. I mean, according to the legends of our religion, he talked to a bunch of guys thousands of years ago, and in the intervening time between then and now people have whole heartedly believed in this idea, and fought wars and lived lives all based on something of which there is no proof.
So why do we believe in God?
We worship this God, this indefinable, impossible, indescribable being. A phenomenon who has been the cause of more deaths and more wars and more terrors then any other being. A God who makes even the most horrible humans look genuinely nice. We are part of a religion that claims to value humility and kindness and goodness, with a God who wiped out entire civilizations, who demanded we worship him and no one or nothing else, a God who is not always good. But yet we believe in him, in our idealized pictures of flowers and rainbows, a grandfather with a white beard, the one who can forgive all sins. And no one dares to say that God may have sinned too.
And so not only do I wonder why we believe in our God, but I wonder why we worship him.
Maybe it is this underlying darkness, our subconscious knowledge that we worship an imperfect God, that allows us to believe in something so impossible. I know that I am not perfect, and it is good to know that something somewhat imperfect is supposed to be in charge. This way incidents like genocide and hunger and earthquakes can be accepted. While everyone all says that God is in fact perfect and that He Has A Plan, maybe its that little itty bitty tiny bit of me that refuses to worship anything that could have purposefully done these things. And that itty little bit is able to be placated by the thought it was a mistake.
Maybe I worship my God because I want to boost His self confidence, so that maybe in the future he won’t screw up again.
Which may answer why I worship God. But not why I believe he exists in the first place.
Maybe it is a need to blame the world’s problems on someone besides myself. Its God’s fault people are starving, and so God can go ahead and fix Her own problems. Maybe I believe in God because it gives meaning to our lives, because I have to believe that there is something more to life than what is obvious. Maybe it is a need for God to fix our brokenness, maybe we need to know that something is out there to help us through our brokenness.
Which also means that God must be good. Because if he is going to fix my brokenness, he had better be good.
Of course, I truly believe that God is in fact good. I believe in a God who is closer to perfect than any of us ever have hopes to be. I believe in the God of my Grandparents and my Great Grandparents. A God who is loving and caring and wonderful.
But that doesn’t mean that I don’t wonder why I believe in him. Why I choose to worship him despite all the things I have seen through human history. Why I worship him with every breath and every song and every step.
Because I believe that God is good.
-Kathleen Kerr
So why do we believe in God?
We worship this God, this indefinable, impossible, indescribable being. A phenomenon who has been the cause of more deaths and more wars and more terrors then any other being. A God who makes even the most horrible humans look genuinely nice. We are part of a religion that claims to value humility and kindness and goodness, with a God who wiped out entire civilizations, who demanded we worship him and no one or nothing else, a God who is not always good. But yet we believe in him, in our idealized pictures of flowers and rainbows, a grandfather with a white beard, the one who can forgive all sins. And no one dares to say that God may have sinned too.
And so not only do I wonder why we believe in our God, but I wonder why we worship him.
Maybe it is this underlying darkness, our subconscious knowledge that we worship an imperfect God, that allows us to believe in something so impossible. I know that I am not perfect, and it is good to know that something somewhat imperfect is supposed to be in charge. This way incidents like genocide and hunger and earthquakes can be accepted. While everyone all says that God is in fact perfect and that He Has A Plan, maybe its that little itty bitty tiny bit of me that refuses to worship anything that could have purposefully done these things. And that itty little bit is able to be placated by the thought it was a mistake.
Maybe I worship my God because I want to boost His self confidence, so that maybe in the future he won’t screw up again.
Which may answer why I worship God. But not why I believe he exists in the first place.
Maybe it is a need to blame the world’s problems on someone besides myself. Its God’s fault people are starving, and so God can go ahead and fix Her own problems. Maybe I believe in God because it gives meaning to our lives, because I have to believe that there is something more to life than what is obvious. Maybe it is a need for God to fix our brokenness, maybe we need to know that something is out there to help us through our brokenness.
Which also means that God must be good. Because if he is going to fix my brokenness, he had better be good.
Of course, I truly believe that God is in fact good. I believe in a God who is closer to perfect than any of us ever have hopes to be. I believe in the God of my Grandparents and my Great Grandparents. A God who is loving and caring and wonderful.
But that doesn’t mean that I don’t wonder why I believe in him. Why I choose to worship him despite all the things I have seen through human history. Why I worship him with every breath and every song and every step.
Because I believe that God is good.
-Kathleen Kerr
Lean on Me: Lessons in Vulnerability
Vulnerability. when you hear this word what comes to mind? Is it weakness, struggling, strength, success? I would venture to say that along with myself before I really experienced vulnerability, most of you thought of the negative connotations this word carries. Vulnerability as weakness, vulnerability as something that is a marker of an unsuccessful or very negative experience. I am currently on a 10 month long journey in France, in which I am an aupair, living about ten minutes by train from Paris. This essentially means that I experience the French culture, while working for a French family who pays room and board and a small salary.
Since I have been here, my eyes have been opened to the concept of vulnerability and forced me question what it is. I have seen vulnerability in many forms; in my own life, in the homeless, busking population of Paris, and in society in general. The song “Lean on Me” immediately came to mind when I was thinking about how I would present these thoughts. I think that this very secular song has a great deal of information for us as Christians. It preaches a message that vulnerability is not a problem, but more importantly that we all have moments of vulnerability in our lives, no matter how blessed we are.
As Christians, our role model to lead a Christian lifestyle, Jesus Christ provides (among other things) a specifically powerful lesson when it comes to vulnerability. Jesus voluntarily entered into life. Ultimately he died because he knew nothing else but to be passionately vulnerable to the plan that God had for him. In terms of relating this to my experience I will start with how I have been vulnerable. I have moved away from family, friends, a girlfriend and everything that I knew and loved, because I felt called. Truthfully, there are thousands of reasons why I would have stayed at home, but I went. I am still vulnerable but I have learned many important life lessons along the way. I will be moving out of the family’s home in the next couple of weeks, and into my own apartment, (hard enough in a country that I am familiar with), and for the first time in my life I will be living alone. My relationship with God is what I have to rely on, and I need to be vulnerable to the lessons I am learning in order to succeed in this new, and sometimes scary environment.
Secondly, I have learned so much more to respect the homeless, and busking population that I have really never been confronted with before. I come from a small village of 1000 people, where everyone knows everyone and I have lived there my entire life. All of a sudden I am in a city of three million where my mother tongue is not the language spoken. I have to rely on public transportation, and I experience first hand the big city life, including homelessness, busking, and other big city characteristics. Homeless people and people who display their musical gifts, or dress up in funny costumes, show me an unbelievable level of vulnerability.
They have given up whatever pride they may have had and rely on others often to just survive. The Parisian people, in general are very unresponsive to this incredible sacrifice, and walk by without a second glance.
If we really reflect on the words of the chorus of “Lean on Me” I think that we can learn a lot and implement it into how we live our lives as Christians. First of all I think it is admitting that yes, we do all have times in our lives where we have pain, and sorrow, and it is okay to not be “strong” all the time. Secondly, it is having that person in your life, or people, or God, or all of the above, to help you in your need. And finally, in return, being there for those people when they need you most of all. This way people get along, and response to the question of vulnerability is not: “I can't believe that, that busker is so stupid to give up all his pride to make a couple dollars on the metro,” but becomes “Wow! He/she is completely submitting to the hand that they have been dealt in life, and have the courage to do everything that they can do to live life to the fullest.” This is the mentality that we are called to have as Christians, and it is the mentality that will change the world for the better. Hindrance? Blessing? You tell me.
-Jesse Root
Since I have been here, my eyes have been opened to the concept of vulnerability and forced me question what it is. I have seen vulnerability in many forms; in my own life, in the homeless, busking population of Paris, and in society in general. The song “Lean on Me” immediately came to mind when I was thinking about how I would present these thoughts. I think that this very secular song has a great deal of information for us as Christians. It preaches a message that vulnerability is not a problem, but more importantly that we all have moments of vulnerability in our lives, no matter how blessed we are.
As Christians, our role model to lead a Christian lifestyle, Jesus Christ provides (among other things) a specifically powerful lesson when it comes to vulnerability. Jesus voluntarily entered into life. Ultimately he died because he knew nothing else but to be passionately vulnerable to the plan that God had for him. In terms of relating this to my experience I will start with how I have been vulnerable. I have moved away from family, friends, a girlfriend and everything that I knew and loved, because I felt called. Truthfully, there are thousands of reasons why I would have stayed at home, but I went. I am still vulnerable but I have learned many important life lessons along the way. I will be moving out of the family’s home in the next couple of weeks, and into my own apartment, (hard enough in a country that I am familiar with), and for the first time in my life I will be living alone. My relationship with God is what I have to rely on, and I need to be vulnerable to the lessons I am learning in order to succeed in this new, and sometimes scary environment.
Secondly, I have learned so much more to respect the homeless, and busking population that I have really never been confronted with before. I come from a small village of 1000 people, where everyone knows everyone and I have lived there my entire life. All of a sudden I am in a city of three million where my mother tongue is not the language spoken. I have to rely on public transportation, and I experience first hand the big city life, including homelessness, busking, and other big city characteristics. Homeless people and people who display their musical gifts, or dress up in funny costumes, show me an unbelievable level of vulnerability.
They have given up whatever pride they may have had and rely on others often to just survive. The Parisian people, in general are very unresponsive to this incredible sacrifice, and walk by without a second glance.
If we really reflect on the words of the chorus of “Lean on Me” I think that we can learn a lot and implement it into how we live our lives as Christians. First of all I think it is admitting that yes, we do all have times in our lives where we have pain, and sorrow, and it is okay to not be “strong” all the time. Secondly, it is having that person in your life, or people, or God, or all of the above, to help you in your need. And finally, in return, being there for those people when they need you most of all. This way people get along, and response to the question of vulnerability is not: “I can't believe that, that busker is so stupid to give up all his pride to make a couple dollars on the metro,” but becomes “Wow! He/she is completely submitting to the hand that they have been dealt in life, and have the courage to do everything that they can do to live life to the fullest.” This is the mentality that we are called to have as Christians, and it is the mentality that will change the world for the better. Hindrance? Blessing? You tell me.
-Jesse Root
Questions from Eden
Recently I have been doing a lot of thinking about Eden, and what exactly the repercussions of Eden have been on humans since that time. While I have come up with no answers, many questions have arisen. Ponder this...
If God is all knowing why did he have do ask “Where are you?” of Adam and Eve?
Was God just being polite? Did She ask this (Where are You?) because She knew what was coming?
Was God so angry after the Eden incident that it caused Him to become the vengeful God of the old Testament? And if this is true, why do we continue loving God?
What made Eden so special? What made it perfect? Was it the closeness to God or the pretty trees or something all together different?
Does all of our human knowledge of God come from the events of Eden?
After Eden, did God become so separate from us that finding Him again becomes difficult?
Would I have eaten the apple?
Did Eve’s biting the apple separate humanity from God so much that he is not all knowing of us?
Maybe it is the memory of Eden that has created a need for religion. Or maybe we just want to believe that there is something better if we were only better, and thus created the story of Eden.
The basis of all human kind in the Christian traditions said to be coming from what happened in Eden. And maybe this is why humans can never be perfect.
-Kathleen Kerr
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